Well I had Ashleigh overnight for her first overnight and it was a success. The joy it brings me, to watch her happy is unexplainable. This morning when we did our flash cards first, over cartoons, her choice by the way. Yes she is 3. Those who don't have facebook won't have a chance to see all the pictures.(Which of course are okayed by her mother my friend Heather) I watched her sleep and I thought, oh my Lord please help me. I am living a lie. I want children, I want to be a wife and a mother. I can't deny it. However, it is impossible for me to do without the right husband. I am lucky and blessed and fortunate to have a friend that lives with me, Blaq Fuego. She loves him and he is SO good with her. I never have to worry about anything. He is a natural. We're a team when I have her. I can't imagine doing it alone. I give my friend all the credit in the world. She is one of my closest friends who I love dearly! I would do anything for her. Everyone one asks how much do I get paid? I said get paid. I beg to take her. I love spending time with her. I love the everyday activities showing them things, teaching them, shopping for them and making them match! Playing games! It is like what I was meant to do! For me it is a privilege to have her for the day. To show her things, take her places. I am even more fortunate to have such a wonderful friend who loves her daughter so much that I know it hurts her to be away from her child and not able to do those things, but is happy that her daughter is happy. She has to provide for her, and it is what it is. She could be jealous and hold her child back but her true love for her daughter shines through. I take pictures, and communicate with her often. I like to think of us as a team. No matter what I do with Ashleigh, what I buy her, were I take her, her mommy is her life! I hope that eases some of your pain Heather. You are not just a great friend, COT, but a great mom as well. Trust me a lot has to do with when we are going to see mommy. A lot of our day revolves around mommy! When we buy a souvenir it's for mommy. When we take pictures it is to show mommy. That's when you know you are doing a great job! For those who don't think that they can't be important in the life of a child, you are sadly mistaken. Nothing brings me such joy.
So I come to everyone today asking for there prayers and guidance. Everyday I wake up and have no clue. Not saying I wouldn't take a job in an instant, but I realize the important things in life. I am 28 and consider myself very fortunate. Thank You Tiger, you made my day. You are a great example. We have people like Barack, Oprah, Tiger, Roscoe Orman, Angelina and Brad, Russell and Rev and Justine of course, Ann, Ryan, people of great influence doing wonderful things and being a great example for the public. I apologize for all those that hack into your personal lives. There are so many I know that could be great mentors, despite age. Reaching out to the youth, becoming involved. I have said it before, a seed was planted when I was young and it grew! That is why I spend so much time with the children and doing things for kids. My mom often says I am like my Aunt Terri and Aunt Beth who did not have children. See you don't realize the effect you may have on a child. Well speaking of which I must get back and attend to the wonderful princess that is in a beautiful outfit eating raisins watching Enchanted. I never knew McDreamy was in that! I should have paid more attention! LOL! Everyone have a great day, enjoy, laugh and be kind! Do something random and something good! Remember we all have a chance of making a difference! ( oh and my mom wanted me to add that I should become a real Nanny, like one that gets paid! Lol) She doesn't usually have much to say so I was impressed she wanted me to add that! LOL! Have a great day!
Love,
Sarah
"morning by morning he dispenses his justice, and every new day he does not fail." Zephaniah 3:5
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